Absence

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some nights
I feel like a footnote in a story
too vast to remember me
a brief flicker of consciousness
caught between ancient stars
and the silence that will outlive them
the world carries on
with its indifferent cadence
and I wonder if my absence
would leave even the smallest crease
in the fabric of things
I shrink beneath the weight of galaxies
of centuries
of all that existed before me
and all that will remain
when my name has dissolved into dust

and still I stand here
a fragile thing aching to matter
in a universe that never promised
I would


35 thoughts on “Absence”

  1. The universe may never stop to announce our significance, but meaning isn’t measured by the size of the stage we’re standing on. It’s measured in the lives we touch, the kindness we offer, the people who would be different because we were here.

    Galaxies are beautiful, but they can’t comfort a friend, make someone laugh, or leave a piece of themselves behind in another person’s heart.

    Maybe we’re small in the grand scale of things. But small doesn’t mean insignificant. A single light can still be seen in the dark.

    And for what it’s worth, your absence would leave a crease. YOU MATTER!!! 🤍

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  3. It’s all a matter of definition, no? Inconsolate, I realise. But here we all are. Defining teleology in distinctly human terms.

    You put the intention out there, a reward is reaped. The question remains as to whether or not we see that met.

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      • Of course having said that, just to be contrary to myself… I do believe to each thing is a purpose and destiny. That every thing has a charism. But, human purposes are exacted by human terms. Still. I think, there are higher and lower purposes.

        And I hold hope that as we advance spiritually, we begin to *feel* the pieces fall in line. I think when we try to hard shouting into the void, and ignoring the augmented echoes as they warp into countersigns, we miss a lot.

        But, what do I know, you know?

      • I agree with you completely here. Human purposes are exacted by human terms. I love that line. I think as we get older (and hopefully wiser, hopefully) the pieces do start to fall into place. I think sometimes, we need to step back, stop shouting and hopefully stop missing a lot. We do miss a lot, I agree. Thank you for your thoughts, you always know what to say.

  5. Truly a heartbreaking piece. To peel back a layer (or several) and be vulnerable and choose no hiding, is valiant. It’s brave.
    As humans, we are indeed “a brief flicker” relative to the age of the universe. But so is Halley’s Comet. And we have learned that some stars are dead before their light even passes through Earth’s atmosphere. So therefore their last moments of existence are, by nature brilliant cascades of sparkling light.
    How damn romantic.
    So, considering all that, it’s love that can endure all of time and existence. It’s love that can “leave even the smallest creases in the fabric of things.”
    So, despite the fact that my individual existence is minute, my universe is all I know. It’s the most vast universe imaginable because it’s all I know!
    But, for me, and I consider myself of the luckiest to exist, the love of my life is not a “footnote in a story.” She IS the story. Her absence would stop my world from spinning. Time would halt.
    I don’t know what the universe truly promises us, but I know her love is my universe. She is the sun around which my heart orbits. My love for her is the gravity that shifts the tides. Her presence in my life is the trees that produce the oxygen.

    And together, we are the light of a million stars that dare to pierce distant atmospheres to show all how brilliant love can be.

    No matter how insignificant we are.

    Reply

    • Your words feel like a constellation answering another across a great distance.

      I wrote from a place of contemplation on how brief we are, but you remind me that brevity and brilliance have always belonged to the same sky. A comet flashes. A star dies. Yet their light continues its journey, touching worlds they will never know.

      And I appreciate your perspective on your love. The poem wrestles with impermanence and scale, but your response is a reminder that meaning isn’t measured by the size of the universe. Sometimes a single person becomes the center of an entire cosmos. “She is the story” is a beautiful line. Perhaps that is the paradox: we are each only a flicker, and yet love makes that flicker feel infinite.

      Thank you for meeting my words with such generosity and wonder. If my piece was a meditation on impermanence, your response feels like an argument for endurance, a reminder that sometimes the light arrives long after the moment that created it, and still illuminates everything it touches.

      Reply

  9. the universe may be vast in its scale of time and space, but to many people, your love and kindness is the sun they depend on to show up in their lives. In that way, your name will stay etched in the sky like the stars of the milky way we see ❤ Mike

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  11. A deeply moving poem. Even in the face of an immense universe, the longing to matter is one of the most human feelings. Your words beautifully capture the tension between feeling small and still choosing to stand, hope, and exist. Powerful and thought-provoking.

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  13. So loved the topic and message in this poem
    Bellissimo, Jennifer, Bellissimo!!!

    Reminds me of a line that haunts me – “What will you leave behind???”

    You are doing great with that challenge and I’m working on it too!
    Chuck 🙂 xoxo

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